Perhaps Not.

I read an article the other day about how it is not really finances that cause the majority of divorces in the US. It went on to say that the reasons varied, and certainly finances were apart of that variance, but usually it was lack of a mental or physical connection that resulted in divorce. Another article about men cheating was similar in nature, talking about a man not getting his emotional needs met and straying for the emotional connection not the sexual one. Anyway, blah blah blah, money is not the root of all evil.

Money is the root of all my ills. I have literally been working as hard as I physically and mentally can for a solid month and no results. I have put so much time into what I need to get done for all my jobs, that I have been neglecting my friends, and my girlfriend. The only person whom I refuse to neglect is my daughter, and even with her I am ashamed when I cannot even purchase a meal for her.

The thing that I hate most about all of this, is a concept that I first remember hearing in college. A chain email that discussed being able to focus on only 2 of the 3 things that you need to focus on to have a successful college experience. Friends, girlfriend, and schoolwork. You could do your friends, and girlfriend, but your schoolwork would suffer, or your schoolwork and friends, but your girlfriend would get pissed, etc. That is the predicament I am in now. I can be a good father and boyfriend, a good provider, and a good friend. I am sucking at everything right now. The work I am doing is just sucking the life out of me and it leaves me with nothing. The only energy that I have left in the day goes to my daughter and my girlfriend is getting frustrated with it. My friends are non-existent, and regardless of how hard I am working, there is no trust or income.

I have been unable to pay the water bill, cannot pay for groceries, and have made no money in 2 months. Now the economy is souring and I am just fucked.